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Posted in Unmasked Excerpt, tagged , , , on February 10, 2017| Leave a Comment »

“What do I want to do in life?”Here I assume a reason for living that is separate from life.- Hugh Prather

The other day I was sitting in my rocker, nursing the baby, and listening to the other kids bicker over homework. I had dinner in the oven and about a million loads of laundry to fold. All I could think was, “This is fun.” Last night, I woke up and realized that what I had been experiencing were the sounds and feelings of a “family;” my family. I guess that’s all I ever really needed; to be a part of a family. It’s not over-rated. I’m so grateful to be experiencing these simple things. I’m so grateful to live! I love my simple, beautiful life!

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Remember 

Posted in Unmasked Excerpt, tagged , , , on February 3, 2017| Leave a Comment »

I think I’m addicted to being a martyr. Why else would I respond more lovingly to my husband when he’s moody and discontented than when he’s balanced and loving? That’s a perplexing question to me. I need clarity here, God. I need You to help me be okay when things are wonderful.

I have everything I’ve ever dreamed of: a wonderful, handsome, loving, successful husband; a beautiful home; the opportunity to be a stay-at-home mom to my precious newborn; two beautiful, healthy daughters; sane relationships with the members of my family; and a strong A.A. program that has helped me to not take a drink for over 5 years. I have it all. What the hell’s the matter with me that I want to nit-pick for flaws rather than sing alleluia? Is it because of the responsibility? Is it because it is difficult? It’s because I’m immature!  

Help me grow up, God! I don’t want to sour this beautiful man who tries so hard to love me. Help me, God! Help me to count my blessings!

I guess the bottom line is that I haven’t been putting God first, which is the only way that I am capable of remembering who I am. I am a child of God who is here to serve and to love and to be loved. 

Once again, I give myself to You, dear God, and ask that You mold me and help my capacity to love expand with all of the changes in my life.

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Beautiful Life

Posted in Unmasked Excerpt, tagged , , on January 28, 2017| Leave a Comment »

Life is so beautiful and God is so wonderful. I live for the moments where the poignant fragility of life trickles in my soul. Life is like butterfly wings; capable of flight, yet also capable of annihilation by even a north wind. 

Thank God for the shelter that is God’s love. I am such a truly blessed person. I am not who I was before and I am ever-changing into the likeness of He who created me. I willingly surrender to this process. Thank You, God!

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Grateful 

Posted in Unmasked Excerpt, tagged , , on January 27, 2017| Leave a Comment »

“The attitude of gratitude is the highest yoga.” – Yogi Bhajan

Dear Holy God,
I thank You for this beautiful dawn; which represents new hope rising in my soul. I give myself to You as your obedient servant. It is my honor to serve You. I thank You for the magnificent transformative process that is my sobriety. What a gift to awaken from hell to find Heaven. I also thank You for abundant good, which is my inheritance, and for the gift of love that motivates me to persevere. I love You with all of my heart, mind, and soul.

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